My Mentor

While we all celebrate Women’s day and talk about career women from Indira Gandhi to Kiran Bedi, my mind revolves around my tiny world of my lovely family. Aachi – That’s how we call my maternal grandma. A strong, bold lady who was my role model even when I was in Kindergarten.

1956 – Just 9 years since we attained independence. My aachi was the first person in our family who stepped out of the home, leaving behind my one year old mom to do her Master degree. She was living hundreds of kilometers away from her family to achieve what she wanted. The entire support was given by aiyya (grandpa) and his mother who took care of my mom, when aachi was away from home.

There she got her Master’s degree and started her career as a Teacher in the little town of Virudhunagar, capital of Kamarajar district in Tamil Nadu. My aiyya (grandpa) who was a tenth std pass, was working in a printing press and encouraged my grandma to achieve what she dreamt of. He never had complains that she is higher than him in education or work.

Aachi still says that she was inspired by her teacher Ms.Paul who would motivate the girls in her class to have their own identity in their life. She would also tell us about the days when school staff would go around the town asking girl children to come to school. She dreamt of becoming the Headmistress of the school where she studied and there she achieved it too. She retired as the Headmistress of the school she studied in with a state award for the Best Teacher! I was in kindergarten when she received the award and I still remember making up my mind that I need to work like her even at that age.

Unlike the husband-wife of today, I haven’t seen them have the ego clashes until today. Seeing aachi caring so much for aiyya even today is something we admire. She takes care of the entire house chores starting from 5 am until 9 pm and aiyya runs his own printing press.

My mother was a B.Sc graduate and also a gold medalist in Mathematics when she got married. My father was the man who supported her to continue her aspiration to do her Master degree in a top institution in Chennai. I still remember the days when he used to fondly take care of us when mom was busy at work. It was the repeat of the cycle of what my grandma went through. Lucky were they to get understanding husbands.

My chithi was a career aspirant too. She is a successful doctor who works 24/7 even now. The history didn’t leave her too. She did her DGO after her wedding, even after her first kid. So time for education or work is never gone in any phase of life if you have an aspiration.

My aachi still says that Women should have good education, career aspiration and above all their own identity. She motivates every girl who talks to her saying that “Whatever maybe the situation, try to sustain in your job and live your own life. It’s not for the financial independence but rather it gives you self-confidence. Do your best in whatever you do and do not worry on the outcome”.

There are days when I feel down and I call her too. I speak to her on my personal and professional ups and downs. She is the one who keeps motivating me every time. She always says “Your life is in your hands. No one can make you feel down. You can do everything and so keep going with your spirits high. Come what may, do your best and you will succeed.”

A lot of my relatives also ask her for opinion and guidance. My brother who is a successful Doctor is also highly influenced by her thoughts and words. I remember her teaching us from childhood that we need our own identity in life and we live for a purpose.

Who said women do not have dreams? Who said women cannot make a career? Who said women do not like working hard? Who said women are just entertainers? Who said women cannot manage teams? Fools are those who say this. Here she is who started dreaming of her career even before independence, right from her school days. My aachi was an excellent all-rounder who even worked with the board members and got involved in important decisions in school. Coming from the same blood line, I too have some traits as hers. I will never ever give up but keep working to create my little identity!

I too did my Masters after my wedding. Lucky am I to see the history repeating with me too. “Behind every man’s success there is a woman” – We know this. Of course seeing my grandpa, dad and my husband I understand the converse is true too!