Thirty Years in Three days

Chennai welcomed me brightly and warmly with her kind temperature of 34 degrees. Four continuous days at my home after more than a year now although I’m located just 330 kms away.

The climate outside forced me to stay indoors. “Amma, let me go to the nearby shop. I’ll be back in 15-20 mins” I stepped out. Picking some cakes for kids, I walked further to see a big building. “Where is Sumathi ma’am’s house? This seems changed” I walked further.

“Grace aunty’s tailor shop is still here. I don’t see her here” I moved on. “Where is the old man who used to sell bananas every evening” his old cycle seemed to disappear. Quite a number of small shops replaced by super markets; the old pathway seems busy; the roads where once upon a time we saw only bicycles, seemed new taking the burden of cars; my old school which stood as the largest building in the 5 km stretch became the smallest with so many houses and shops around.

Well, these haven’t changed since just a year but over a period of time. Whenever I visited my home, I was just indoors with parents and sister and failed to see the changes around. I decided to walk further, physically down the street and mentally down the memory lane!

I walked to my favourite Gengaiamman temple which was an abode to many of us. Tenth standard days – every evening visit to this shrine was our ritual. Rekha, Mohana, Preetha, Dhana – and sometimes with other friends too. Ganesha under the tree was our go to person for exams. The char coal writings with name of the student and class was a must to get good marks. Some pair names too! “My Ganesha” claimed each of us. Visits to him and the goddess before our evening study class started made us positive always.

I paid a visit to the shrine and could see the changes everywhere inside. Posh marble floors had replaced the old muddy floors. Ganesha seemed to have changed his place – from outdoor to indoor and his brother happily smiled at his new place. Gengai Amma sits gracefully and is still the same as always. I closed my eyes as usual but this time with a note of gratitude and thanks for all that changes and experiences she’s given so far. As I closed my eyes, every little experience we had at this place popped in fresh in my mind. A video player played the tunes of music, happiness, sadness, friendship, love, hatred – across my mind – memories since a couple of decades.

I came out of the temple to see graceful Lakshmi akka who had a loud voice tying jasmine flowers. “Is that she?” my mind alarmed. Strings of grey hair across and she still wore the same smile. “Akka, do you remember me?” She smiled in return. She was happy that I remembered and enquired about her two little kids who are now working too.

I walked further to see Babu anna with glasses and he was no exception to the colour changes in his hair and weight loss too. How many times have I walked in here to get paracetamol and other medicines? This was the only pharmacy then with few customers but now every street had one fancy pharmacy overcrowded on its own. “Has the diseases increased with years?” I asked myself.

“Aunty! How are you? How’s Suresh anna?” I smiled. She smiled with warmth and asked about me. “Aunty, you used to bring lunch for him. I was in his bus number 7 at college”. He was my college bus driver and this aunty is his mom. She said “I don’t remember you exactly but you seem to ask how am I. I’m happy someone asks me. He’s not the same ma. I need to take care of myself now!” she weeped. “Don’t worry aunty. Everything will be alright soon. Take care”. “Take this flowers dear” she gave me a strand of jasmine that she was tying and I handed over some money which she failed to take. “This is for remembering me and asking how I am. Someone somewhere asks about me. God bless you” I was moved and my eyes were wet.

As I came home, memories of my school, the time we spent with friends, the fights, the hugs, the cries, the laughter seemed to bring a smile with tears rolling down my cheeks. Why don’t I try to bring back some memories and relationships? I thought to myself.

April 20 – the calendar reminded. I got reminded of my childhood friend Chitra whose birthday was in two days. Probably we met before four years and I just exchanged birthday wishes once a year. We spoke very rarely but still felt connected. I missed her wedding a couple of months ago and I called her landline now. I was happy talking to her dad and he mentioned that she just left to her home. “Just missed” I cursed myself. I called her to get her address. She was excited as me when I said I’m coming to meet her and I was glad to hear her enthusiasm.

I traveled about 15 kms and met her. Stories of our favourite lemon pickle, the hired cycle for 2 rupees, her brother pushing us, our fights, skits and adzaps with Prabhu, Catherine, Steffy, Sumione and us – we laughed aloud until our stomachs ached. The chasing blacky, the jumps across the walls, our teachers appreciating and depreciating us, the parents teachers meet, the sports day, the punishments, our anger with God and curses we threw at God – what else could spike our energy levels. Lovely memories with smile and tears and we had to end our meeting with a hug and promise that we will meet often.

As I took the auto back home, I felt refreshed under the hot sun. The sun didn’t seem to prick me now and I was enjoying comfortably with memories and my eyes were sweating too!

Way back home, I was pondering on the little discussions I had with people who I lost touch since a decade or longer. We all seem to be active on Facebook and Whatsapp and feel happy that we’re connected. Thanks to the technology that makes the world smaller and smaller.

However what’s the element that we miss? Beyond the so called “virtual reality”, there is a “truthful connectivity” that no 4G or 5G can give. Facebook may give you the options of “what’s on your mind or what you are upto”, Whatsapp may overload with emojis and stickers to express yourself – however none of these can replace your true feelings and personal connect. A simple “hi”, a warm “how are you”, a vocal “happy birthday” brings back your cherishing moments in life with a real personal touch. We may run behind our busy schedules and try to replace our feelings and emotions by using all fancy gadgets around us. This is just like an artificial support of oxygen. But taking some time out to meet real people outside and exchange love helps us breathe fresh. Easter seemed to resurrect the lost me too!

Three days of vacation brought back thirty years of memories and revived me. Beyond the small screen there is an open screen which we must cherish. Do not get lost in virtual reality but get back to the personal connectivity!